BORDEN-CARLETON — A kooky, weird sicko has done something that has caused revulsion among fellow Islanders: Johnny “Champ” Gallant has eaten a baked potato without butter.
I know. I know!
As Champ states, “Sometimes, I just don’t feel like drowning my potato in a cup of melted butter [like any normal human being does]. I just want to taste the potato itself [even though they are as dry as the dickens].”
Sources say that this is not the first time that Champ has pulled this sort of stunt. A few weeks ago, Champ reportedly ate a cob of corn without butter as well.
Just plain weird.
It is unclear what Champ is trying to prove, however, since science has agreed that potatoes must be eaten with at least 125ml of butter per serving, and eating a potato without the recommended dose of butter goes against current health guidelines.
At this time, it is suggested that all Islanders ignore Champ’s antics, as this sort of behavior goes against the very nature of being an Islander.
The Islander 